How About We Hunt Animal Serial Killers?


Animal serial killers (commonly referred to as hunters) consider it sport and recreation to kill other creatures.

They use sophisticated weapons against animals who do not even know they are being hunted.

It seems manifestly unfair in the most positive light, and sadistic murder in the most unflattering.

How about we give them a dose of the same medicine?

What if we hunted hunters for sport and fun?

My guess is that they would not go along with the idea. But I’d love to see how they liked being stalked and shot at.

A couple of caveats: this is might be illegal and would likely be frowned upon by the local authorities.

Even so, I think it could be done without our being caught. Being caught is not a risk hunters run. Murdering animals is perfectly legal.

Which says volumes about the system under which we live.

First we decide what kind of game we are after.

Kendall Jones? Dr. Walter Palmer? Ted Nugent? Sarah Palin? Donald Trump, Jr? Run of the mill NRA animal killers?

Once we decide, we must do our homework. What is their natural habitat? What are their feeding habits? Migration patterns? Local watering holes?

Human law has made all these serial killers out-of-season, so we have to be careful of game wardens (local police).

To heighten the sport, I suggest long guns at long distances. Not only does this make the contest more equitable (notice we are more concerned with sportsmanship than they are) it would allow us to avoid being cited by Fish and Game.

Unlike the animals these serial killers hunt, we would be affording our quarry a certain amount of forewarning (assuming they read the Armory!).

There are shooting ranges almost everywhere, so we can perfect rifle shooting.

All-in-all, I think this would be a rewarding and relaxing hobby for animal activists.

On a cautionary note, I would suggest not collecting or dressing out the carcasses, as possession of same would likely be problematic as far as local authorities are concerned. They may consider it evidence of the violation of some statute or local ordinance. Much better to leave the meat for wildlife to consume.

My sense is that if a few of the more notorious serial killers were to be taken, word would quickly spread that they were unsafe no matter what they were doing, whether at work, at home, or wherever. I suspect the cowards who kill for fun would take up bowling or billiards rather than risk being someone else’s prey.

That they might meet their fates while taking a walk or eating dinner would have a sobering effect on the swaggering, macho bullies.

Have fun. And remember that you are adding to the conservation effort.


31 thoughts on “How About We Hunt Animal Serial Killers?

  1. Despite the fact I’ve been dream killing her for months now, and “daydream” slaughtering her (stress reliever) I would like to add a name to the top of the list of people who desperately deserve to be killed like the animals that they kill. While I’m not technically sure that she’s a “hunter” per say in the traditional sense, her actions were entirely those of a hunter – inhumane, cruel, callous, disgusting, repulsive, senseless, etc., etc.. Most of you will probably recognize this name Kristen Lindsey, FORMER Texas veterinarian (as of October 2015) – the (BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP) woman who shot Tiger the cat in the head with an arrow and proudly posted the photo of it on the Net…if you remember correctly, she was holding the dead body of the cat, with the arrow still in the cat’s head up in the air like some sort of trophy. Texas will NOT charge her with any crime, (I’ll pretend to be shocked here) however, the State Board did take away her license to practice vet med because she broke “rules”. However, it’s NOT over yet because the woman has “rejected” the Board’s decision and is seeking to have the State Board’s ruling over thrown.

    Maybe it’s me. Maybe it’s just because I really, really, really, really, really hate this woman but…I really think that this would just one of the best candidates for hunting if, in fact, there would ever be a “Purge” or a “Human Season”. Again, I’m too much of a wuss for killing but scaring the crap out of people…I would do it.


  2. I would love to join the hunt, but only if I get to sit on the animal serial killer that I was able to “take” and get a photograph of me smiling from ear to ear about how proud I am. The difference between the picture of me smiling while sitting on a trophy hunter and the photo that I’m referencing (the woman sitting on the giraffe that she killed holding her gun and gloating) is that I would gloat but with legitimate reason, she is an abomination.

    Seriously though, we couldn’t kill enough trophy hunters to scare them out of it or they would all resort to canned hunting. I suppose busting up some of those hell holes could prevent that from happening. Okay, where do I sign up. Oh, are there any of those “Grand Slam” challenges, you know, where you get an award if you kill one with the biggest ego, one with the biggest sense of entitlement, one with the smallest….

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Yes because 2 wrongs always make a right??? Let’s act the same or worse then this people that should make us all feel better, right???=:3


  4. I am confused. Are you talking all hunters to include those who hunt for food in rural areas (Like Maine or Alaska), or the ones who hang heads on the walls?


  5. These are indeed the worst of humans, to be put away and expose them for cruel heartless crimes they did.
    We don’t need people like them in the world, if there are cold and heartless towards animal rest assure they are cold and hearles killing humans. How can this be allowed????

    Liked by 5 people

  6. Hunt the hunters! Where do I sign up!
    This senseless killing for “sport” has gone on for too long.
    These beautiful defienless animals are being stalked and killed in their own habitat…and for what so bored rich people can hang their heads on a wall and have something to put their sofas on. It is discusting, cruel, senseless and irresponsible.

    Wildlife will soon be extinct, not by nature but by senseless horrible humans.

    Liked by 4 people

  7. Good post but apropos of the previous one that by all outward appearances rendered the right wing apoplectic, I’d have given it an even more pointed title: “Save wildlife, shoot a Safari Club International member.” And when I voice that sentiment I’m not being the least bit facetious.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Geoff,
      You are all talk. I don’t talk about eliminating a particular subgroup of humans because I’m not prepared to do so, yet you seem to be, or, again, is your writing merely all talk?. Why don’t you describe the post-carnist world for me, because I have no idea what this post-revolutionary world you guys imagine will look like.


  8. Caçadores sao assassinos cruéis e psicopatas, são assassinos em série, muitos animais são presas fácil para estes desgraçados. A caça tem que ser proibida. E estes assassinos cruéis tem que pagar pelo assassinato de milhares de animais indefesos.


  9. Let’s stay away from comparisons like that. They give hunters an excuse to portray us as crazy people who are prepared to kill humans. This only undermines our credibility.


    • It’s only fair. And after all, humans have surpassed their carrying capacity. Wildlife has not. And if wildlife does reach a higher number than the ecosystem can support, it is nearly always the fault of humanity.


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